Mujer Educada: First-Generation Chicana/Latina College Graduates’ (Be)Longing and Resistance Within The University And Family

Abstract

Higher education research often defines success as retention and graduation, yet for many marginalized student populations who are the first in their family to attend college, many other identities, and experiences factor into this notion of success. For Chicana/Latina first-generation college students, their cultural backgrounds, multiple social identities, and families matter in their respective college and graduate narratives. This dissertation study pushes the boundaries of higher education research by carving out spaces for those narratives and argues that the re-telling of their stories evokes new understandings of how the notion of (be)longing complicates the college experience for these formally educated women of color. (Be)longing, in this study, refers to the separate and/or simultaneous feelings of belonging and longing to belong to a particular community like family and college. The purpose of my qualitative study is to understand how the intersecting identities of Chicana/Latina college graduates influence their experience with and membership in their familias. This qualitative study is grounded in the testimonio/pláticas of 12 Chicana/Latina first-generation college graduates of Research 1 institution in the Southwest U.S. Each participant engaged in two testimonio/pláticas with me and an optional group testimonio/plática with other mujeres of this study. I blend the strengths and minimizes the weakness of Anzaldúa’s mestiza consciousness (2007) and Yosso’s (2005) community cultural wealth to craft a conceptual framework I name mujerista consciousness and applies that framework to the analysis of the narratives. I engage in a cyclic analytical process called Chicana intuition narrative inquiry and share three ofrendas. The first ofrenda offers insight into how first-generation Chicana/Latina college graduates embody intersectionality within and outside of their families. The second ofrenda looks at the uncertainties with which Chicanas/Latinas choose to share and withhold seminal academic and identity-related experiences and accomplishments from family members. The third ofrenda highlights how family and culture influence the values these mujeres' values while navigating college and beyond. Yet, when they put their knowledge, values, or skills learned from the college experience to use in ways that differ from family, they encounter tension and pushback, especially on critical consciousness-raising, social injustice, sexuality, and sexism. The dissertation concludes with a reflection and expansion on the mujerista consciousness and Chicana intuition narrative inquiry, as well as implications for research and practice aimed at improving the field and its educators in serving first-generation Chicana/Latina college students.